a small, plastic, flask-like bottle of vodka

So yesterday I had this need to make pasta with vodka sauce, but I hadn't the first clue how to make it. So I went to Google and typed in "Vodka Sauce," and this recipe was my first result. Not bad. So I went out to the store and got a few things I needed, like cheese and pasta and, well, Vodka.

Now I don't like Vodka, so I really didn't need all that much. I thought I'd just get one of those smaller bottles. You know they type of bottles I'm talking about: they're like disposable flasks, they look like they would fit just perfectly in one of the inside pockets of your overcoat (pre-supposing that you have an overcoat, that is). I buy one of these bottles, it has Smirnoff inside. The guy behind the counter slips it into one of those really long bags especially designed for bottles of booze. I take it home, along with the rest of my groceries, and when I get to my house, I take it out and notice it's made out of plastic. The bottle is, I mean. "New shatter-proof container," the label reads.

So I turn the bottle around and read the back label (like a flask, the back is curved, presumeably so the bottle will fit the contours of your body as you carry it in the inside pocket of your overcoat). The back label says something about "enjoy Smirnoff, blah blah blah, try a creative Smirnoff cocktail!" Which sounded more like a pleading of "please, don't drink this right out of the bottle! Have some dignity, for crissakes!" than it did a suggestion to try something new and different?

Probably because if I wanted to try something new and different, a small, flask-like plastic bottle of vodka would most likely not be involved.

Except for this case. Despite the fact that I used the aforementioned recipe only as a vague roadmap for making my dinner, it really turned out OK.